Tuesday, September 22, 2009

True Life Stories

Here is the actual record of the conversation as best I can remember it. I was on a flight 2 weeks ago from Jaipur to Delhi (India), and sitting next to two Indian men in their early thirties. I had just been served lunch, and did not eat my dessert (condensed milk candy).

GUY #1: You no like dessert?
PHIL: I like it, I just wasn't that hungry.
GUY #1: You have tried? Very good dessert.
PHIL: Yeah, I've tried it before, I like it.
GUY #1: Which country, England?
PHIL: No, America.
GUY #1: Ah, very good country.
GUY #1: How many girlfriend?
PHIL: What?
GUY #1: How many girlfriend you have?
PHIL: Well, just one, I guess. [AWKWARD LAUGH]
GUY #1: One? Just one?
PHIL: Well, right now, yes.
GUY #1: No, how many women?
PHIL: You mean total?
GUY #1: Yes.
PHIL: You mean, like, how many women have I slept with?
GUY #1: Yes.
GUY #1: Ah. [NODS]
GUY #1: [LEANING OVER AND POINTING AT GUY #2 IN AISLE SEAT] My friend, he once fuck 17 women.
GUY #2: 17 women, yes.
PHIL: [AWKWARD LAUGH] You mean, like, at the same time?
GUY #2: Yes.
PHIL: I don't understand how that's possible. 17 women all in the same room.
GUY #2: Ah no, not same time. I fuck one, go to other house [GESTURES WITH HAND], here, here, here. 3 in one day. 17 women.
PHIL: That must have been difficult to keep track of.
PHIL resumes reading his book.
GUY #1: Why you read?
PHIL: My book?
GUY #1: Yes, you read too much. Why you read?
PHIL: I like books I guess.
GUY #2 [TO GUY #1]: No, in west is very normal. What he does is very normal.
GUY #1: In India, we do not like books.
PHIL: You don't read books at all?
GUY #2: No, we too busy.
GUY #1: We fuck the girls.
PHIL: Where are you guys from?
GUY #1: Jodhpur.
PHIL: What brings you to Delhi?
GUY #1: Business.
GUY #2: We fly to Germany for business.
PHIL: What kind of business?
GUY #1: Furniture.
PHIL: Are you going straight to Germany from here?
GUY #1: No, we go to fuck the girl!
PHIL: Your girlfriends are in Delhi?
GUY #2: Girlfriends no. The call girl.
GUY #1: We go to fuck the call girl.
GUY #2: We are just kidding. We have business meeting.


GUY #1: Thank you for listening to us.
GUY #2: Yes, thank you.
PHIL: Enjoy your trip!


Sunday, September 20, 2009

Death of a Stegosaurus GRAND FINALE!!!!!

...and there we have it. I hope you've enjoyed reading it as much as I've enjoyed drawing it. You might argue that the ending is completely open for a sequel, and you'd be right, but I don't think it's going to happen. I'll still update, of course, but I'm looking forward to getting back to random jokes and Conservative Bananacopters.

Death of a Stegosaurus EPILOGUE 2

Thursday, August 27, 2009

Death of a Stegosaurus Epilogue I

Thought I'd forgotten about Superbanana, didn'tcha?

Tuesday, August 25, 2009

Death of a Stegosuaurs Part 43 - THRILLING CONCLUSION!

So there you have it. Don't worry, it's not the real end. There's still a 3-part epilogue, and a couple more twists up my sleeve...

Monday, August 24, 2009

Death of a Stegosaurus Part 42

Next comic will be the thrilling conclusion! I am now working on a 4 strip epilogue, and then the story will all be tied up with a neat little bow...

Wednesday, August 19, 2009

Death of a Stegosaurus Part 39

Death of a Banana. Time for last-minute title change?

Tuesday, August 18, 2009

Death of a Stegosaurus Part 38

Perhaps you're wondering how an apple and a pineapple conceived a banana. Perhaps you're also wondering also how an apple could grow a beard, hair being a mammalian trait and all. Honestly, I wish I knew.

Monday, July 27, 2009



Wednesday, July 15, 2009

Death of a Stegosaurus Part 30

The Science of Death of a Stegosaurus

According to evolutionary biologist and President of Britain's Royal Society, humans share 50% of their DNA with bananas. We share almost 99% of our DNA with chimps, and over half of the 1% difference relates to scent receptors (chimps have more). Unfortunately for chimps, they are not delicious nor filled with 14 vitamins and minerals.

An aside to my nerdier readers: the codons in panel one are switched, so AAC should correspond to Asparagine and ACG should correspond to Threonine.

An aside to my even nerdier readers: The codon on the bottom would actually be UUG (Leucine) because the coding strand would be on the opposite side of the helix.

Monday, July 13, 2009

The Cuddliest Mother Fluffer

When I visited Orange County with Lila two weeks ago, local surfer/ extreme sports enthusiast EZ-Bake (and her even more xtreme alter ego Ms. Viper) clued me in to some new surf lingo. Apparently, nobody says "surfing the waves" or "shredding the gnar" anymore -- it's "cuddling the fluff." Playing tennis is called "serving the meatballs." And only the biggest badasses around have a 4-square court in their backyard. Seriously, if you go to someone's house and they have a 4-square court, turn around and leave immediately. You couldn't handle the heat.

Wednesday, June 17, 2009

Death of a Stegosaurus Part 21

I changed the posting rules so anyone can comment (even anonymously) now. Don't be shy!

Death of a Stegosaurus Part 20

Death of a Stegosaurus Part 19

So not chill.

Death of a Stegosaurus Part 18

Death of a Stegosaurus Part 17

I got a lot of drawing done on the flight home.

Death of a Stegosaurus Part 16

I'm happy to report a few changes to the SuperNova Media Takeover (tm) operation.

I've relocated back to Stanford from Madrid, meaning that I actually have access to a scanner now. Previously, the only means I had of uploading the comics was to take pictures of them with my digital camera, which yields lower quality, especially because I broke my camera's screen by sitting down with it in my back pocket. Since I couldn't actually see what I was taking pictures of I would just take close-ups of my comics from various distances and amounts of light and hope that one turned out OK, and if not, I usually just posted it anyway out of laziness. If I'm feeling up to the task I'll re-scan all the old comics and post them again as better images. Or maybe not.

Monday, June 8, 2009

Death of a Stegosaurus Part 15


As my avid fans should know, I have a subscription to Spin magazine that cost me $3000. For that kind of money, I expect quality, but all their reviews are written in some kind of hipster gibberish language.

From their review of Yeah Yeah Yeah's It's Blitz!, May 2009 (9/10 stars):

"In many ways, Karen O is the spiritual den mother of the late-aughts Facebook strays who embraced MGMT's "Time to Pretend" and "Kids" as winkingly misty, Linus-blanket hymns. But like so many implicated in New York City's emergence as a stylishly scruffy rock mecca, and then as a post-Ground Zero sandbox of retro-kitsch and nü-rave denial, she bailed (to Los Angeles, coincidentally, where an even more starfucked version of the same scene was oozing around culture-hustler Steve Aoki). Now, responding to the laptop new-wave and neo-disco detritus that washed up in her wake, Karen's back, offering a couch to crash on, but also issuing challenges."

From their review of U2's No Line on the Horizon, March 2009 (3.5/5 stars):

""I’ll Go Crazy if I Don’t Go Crazy Tonight” reads like a bumper sticker on an SUV in a Wal-Mart parking lot -- a meek yelp of rebellion from a mortgage-stressed husband who dreams of creeping out for Nascar Bud Shootout night at Hooters. But on the song of that title from U2’s 12th studio album, Bono belts out the line with liberating glee -- like a giddy favela kid swinging onto an arm of Rio’s Christ the Redeemer statue."

So the song sounds like "a giddy favela kid swinging onto an arm of Rio's Christ the Redeemer statue"? The lead singer of the Yeah Yeah Yeahs gave birth to some people who use facebook and like blankets, possibly after being impregnated by some dude named Steve Aoki, and now I can sleep on her couch if I can pass her challenges?

I know it's impossible to describe what music sounds like, but there's got to be a better way than extended metaphors infused with a heavy dose of pointless name checking. That's why I propose this: if you're going to not make sense, at least make it entertaining.

Monday, May 25, 2009

Wednesday, May 13, 2009